TW asks for an apple. He has already eaten breakfast, but my guess is he saw something red. Apples are Red. I want an apple.
Step 1. Confirm he really wants an apple.
“You want an apple?”
“Yes.”
“You are hungry, you want to eat an apple?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, let me get you an apple.”
Step 2. Go to the kitchen, get the apple, start washing the apple.
Step 3. Stop washing the apple, get Richard off the kitchen table, because apparently he decided to climb up the table the minute you stepped away.
Step 4. Finish washing the apple, find peeler.
Step 5. “Bad Baby!” yells Timothy. Go back to the kids, ask Richard to give the book back to Timothy that he was reading. This may take some time. Find another book that may interest Richard. Once Richard has his new book, return the debated book back to Timothy.
Step 6. Start peeling apple.
Step 7. “Purple, Purple, Purple, Purple.” First Timothy starts asking, then demanding, then yelling. His brother joins in unison.
“Do you want the apple or do you want purple?” (Purple is the code word for Gatorade.)
“Purple.”
“Can you say please?”
“Please purple.”
Pour two cups of Gatorade, water them down. Give them to the kids.
Step 8. Continue peeling apple.
Step 9. Take towels, lots and lots of towels to the play room to clean up split Gatorade, since Richard didn’t really want “purple” he just wanted to open up the cup so he could make splashy sounds against the floor.
Step 10. Continue peeling apple.
Step 11. Get Richard off the furniture again, so he doesn’t fall off and die.
Step 12. Continue peeling apple.
Step 13. Find apple cutter.
Step 14. “BAD DOG!” Go back to the kid’s play area, to rescue Bunny Foo from the dog. Timothy never plays with the stuffed bunny, but for some reason, he decided to play with it right now and the dog decided he wanted it too.
Step 15. Get a dog treat for dog to cajole him outside of the kid’s play area.
Step 16. Ask Timothy if he would like to help cutting the apple. Timothy comes into the kitchen. He really likes when the little green gizmo slices apples into 6 perfect wedges.
Step 17. Ask timothy to wait, while you get Richard off the furniture again.
Step 18. Dice the apples.
Step 19. “Apples, Apples Apples.” Richard has decided he wants apples too.
Step 20. Get two bowls and divide the apples slices evenly for the two cave-babies.
Step 21. Timothy takes his bowl and dumps the apples into his garbage truck and starts using them as a prop. Richard dumps them on the floor and the dog runs up and gobbles them up.
The whole process should take around 30 minutes. Now, just sit back and wait for them to ask for something else they don’t really want.
Step 1. Confirm he really wants an apple.
“You want an apple?”
“Yes.”
“You are hungry, you want to eat an apple?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, let me get you an apple.”
Step 2. Go to the kitchen, get the apple, start washing the apple.
Step 3. Stop washing the apple, get Richard off the kitchen table, because apparently he decided to climb up the table the minute you stepped away.
Step 4. Finish washing the apple, find peeler.
Step 5. “Bad Baby!” yells Timothy. Go back to the kids, ask Richard to give the book back to Timothy that he was reading. This may take some time. Find another book that may interest Richard. Once Richard has his new book, return the debated book back to Timothy.
Step 6. Start peeling apple.
Step 7. “Purple, Purple, Purple, Purple.” First Timothy starts asking, then demanding, then yelling. His brother joins in unison.
“Do you want the apple or do you want purple?” (Purple is the code word for Gatorade.)
“Purple.”
“Can you say please?”
“Please purple.”
Pour two cups of Gatorade, water them down. Give them to the kids.
Step 8. Continue peeling apple.
Step 9. Take towels, lots and lots of towels to the play room to clean up split Gatorade, since Richard didn’t really want “purple” he just wanted to open up the cup so he could make splashy sounds against the floor.
Step 10. Continue peeling apple.
Step 11. Get Richard off the furniture again, so he doesn’t fall off and die.
Step 12. Continue peeling apple.
Step 13. Find apple cutter.
Step 14. “BAD DOG!” Go back to the kid’s play area, to rescue Bunny Foo from the dog. Timothy never plays with the stuffed bunny, but for some reason, he decided to play with it right now and the dog decided he wanted it too.
Step 15. Get a dog treat for dog to cajole him outside of the kid’s play area.
Step 16. Ask Timothy if he would like to help cutting the apple. Timothy comes into the kitchen. He really likes when the little green gizmo slices apples into 6 perfect wedges.
Step 17. Ask timothy to wait, while you get Richard off the furniture again.
Step 18. Dice the apples.
Step 19. “Apples, Apples Apples.” Richard has decided he wants apples too.
Step 20. Get two bowls and divide the apples slices evenly for the two cave-babies.
Step 21. Timothy takes his bowl and dumps the apples into his garbage truck and starts using them as a prop. Richard dumps them on the floor and the dog runs up and gobbles them up.
The whole process should take around 30 minutes. Now, just sit back and wait for them to ask for something else they don’t really want.